an Ode to the Travel Narrative poems
Up & Down
the West Coast
One & Two
the No Lesson, Lesson
Your 2 Syllable Name
Jack and Jesus
High treason my thoughts and inactions
towards the sell out best for this price
earn more than you’re paid they say
that this is what is best for the business and business
is a person so do unto others amiright-
when did we agree that this is a good citizen
duty to society, apathetic dulling tv radio phone
numbing is society. How can you have a genuine personality
when they’ve told you exactly how to behave
and you listen, because, well, there is no reason
not to except
I just don’t want to
all my heroes die young
like on the road beat bopping and drunk flap reckless
then left out in the cold, frozen solid
starting out as an ouroboros
but kept munching and couldn’t get sober, so
the circle kept getting smaller until dead at 47
47! You ain’t even half way man
is it suicide or cannibalism when you eat yourself alive?
but my hero, fatal flawed and im-m-m-mperfect
because we learn while learning in on the edge
sinking down or getting high
and I’m in between both Jesus Christ and the devilish Jack
both dead, both died, both alive
in books, in holy writs
in the reflections of my face when I look
at the mirror seeing myself for like the first time
I swear I think like this every time I have
black coffee or black lungs but I feel healthy
like how the road to heaven looks the same
as the road to hell, so how could you tell?
If they're the same then I must've been deceived, I guess
it all boils down to honesty ::::::::: is that lame?
It’s cold, in this building
i only ever look outside
feeling trapped. Like a monster
in a cage i feel not
is this growing up?
Is this how people spend
their lives waning
away in front of a magical box
every single day?
My God, fuck
I’ve got to
find another way
out to make money
understand that I am
an animal yet more
or less in need
of space to roam
and wrestle in
Looking at the new
moon and thinking
“have we met?”
i see you in different lights-
flip you over
in my mind i roll my tongue
over your name
practicing it as a thing
Precious as a petal
fallen from the stem of our time
(all time, i suppose, too) brief
and i want to take it all in
I want to ask you so many questions.
I want to hear you speak every word
I want to see you silhouetted
as a shape, then
I want to see you in vivid sun
shine on every freckle
i’m not done, with your skin
I want to feel when you’re cold
I tell myself not to lose
my romanticism with love, with poetry- is it scary
growing old? If I am lucky, then I am
a quarter way through. Already I’m older
than some of these evergreen trees,
though they are taller and deeper
see how much I still have left to learn? Still,
I have gone higher still, deeper still, still
I have something to add. Mystery
enabling comedy and tragedy- there’s a story
about loneliness and friendship, God and nothing, earth
and me- isn’t it all connected?
I’m not sure how I came to see things this way
but now I can’t look away.
Thought after thought after thought,
are you looking for some magic?
There is some leftover in the tray
more in the night sky.
you woke up right now
what would your first thought be?
Perhaps ‘what’ will do,
if a word is needed
then something fantastic
like ego eyes
or a melody
or the sum cycle of a 24 hour house fly.
I’m just searching for your attention,
any little thing will do.
As I was driving the rain
and I was afraid
but mesmerized too
by the colors reflecting off the concrete.
I wonder, sometimes
I can’t stop. My mind
behaves like swirling air
pulling at you, pulling at me
getting written down.
consists in the advance and retreat
dance like - like lighting like metaphors
grasping but not exactly capturing exactly
what I’m talking about
Pop and shake your way into my mind like the tip-tap-bop
sounds of a dance, you’re an onomatopoeia, I swear
you reverberate my thoughts like sound waves
like last night I repeated your name as two syllables-two notes
and I'm walking a hundred miles every moonlit hour
I just can’t get over your mind
Darling, do you know that people crumble all the time?
as I’m sure you must have but look at yourself now
and imagine from my eyes; I’ll expound again,
you’re like a word on a page that I can’t give a definition to
but I say aloud again and again
and again stumble out open into the wild world listening now
shaping my lips in different forms and testing it to your lips
I’m humming, you’re humming, these are sounds we don’t hear
but we sense nonetheless, resonance is noise
we feel in our bodies.
Fall must be the most kinetic of seasons, what a time to meet you
what a time to get your name stuck on my tongue
what a time to surprise myself, I repeat myself
often because my groove is a sporadic rhythm
and I’m confessing every dog gone thought to you
as if this is some confessional, I just want to hear your words
because they fill my mind each unique and ineffable in reality
like the gods of a pantheon, then you're the muse
beyond begging the question, but what else can I say
I have so many questions still left to ask
He roared screaming down the silver road with his heels
fast up over the handlebars kicking wild
and that wide child smile looking ahead off further than the setting sun-
We had that caged city feeling again, so we went off again
to the surrounding islands and the great primordial peninsula of Washington
never tamed and we flung against it all sanctifying our cloggy souls
with asphalt and rubber and the forest all around reminding ourselves that it
ain’t for the future the way we living.
Back then he and I did not not believe, but felt propelled nonetheless
simply by ourselves. It was ever West
no matter which way we were headed, every direction onward;
and things will change, we’ve already learn't that lesson
so right on, write on, ride on
don’t hang back on account of any flap, Jack’s On the Road
listening to the beat, we’re learning the rhythm
proving there’s more out there of every sort of thing holy and profane
and both the same, mementoes of change, teaching our humble hungry minds
how to drive.
a Brisk Fall Walk
I’m afraid you think I talk to everyone the way I talk to you. I’m afraid that just because I know the problem, I don’t know the answer. I’m afraid it’s all just a game and I’m just a human. I’m afraid there’s no point, but it’s still a big object (this is just the way I feel). I’m afraid I’m too sensitive and already feeling sore. I’m afraid you don’t think I’m taking this seriously. I’m afraid I’m taking this way too seriously.
3 feet off the ground swinging side to side
like a careless sleepy child the sun warms
my stomach and though my eyes are closed
patches of light still break through
my eyelids like goblins and lizards
imagined in my mind -real even if
never seen - usually i am ready to run
but today i will stay, still and low
hanging in my hammock. There is no
point to this other than to say
enjoy everything for what it is.
Don’t fill in the gaps of my meaning just allow all these words to populate your brain while your eyes flash by and forget it all the next one Day. Afternoon. Evening. Night. BLACK. mourning. still. joy. all. joy. here.
you-and-me is. you-and-you is. me-and-me wind. breezes. soft. like.
butterflies-and-me breathe. Expand. breath. again. deeper. more (there’s pride) “can you hold something with an open palm?” yes. that. butterfly. in. my-mind flies. I-wonder. where. it. goes. when. I-stop eyes. LIGHT and go about your day.
Drop down menu on the airplane gives an impression of a ‘choose your own adventure’ but I know better, these things come and go on the weekend flow and the best I can do is try my best to remember snippets like these pictures, as if we’re pithy disasters, don’t take it all in just sip on the nectar. Everyone/everywhere is so damn similar unless you crack open the second layer then check it out, what a wonder you and I - I ain’t a pretender I won’t recall the names of the dives or cafes because those don’t really matter, but your name and your face I will.
I was high tide about time for another storyline, feeling myself all new and fresh in a dead ass tourist trap Greek dream i-land // the baptismal mocks the Ocean. I came out of my lover, Salt-Water, forever the first born Sun call me Adam. I turned around on the shoreline towards my dark blue horizon, I’ll call you Eve (oh baby, I know you’re the entire Ocean). I twist my legs up through your swirling waves, surfing on your surface bare skin babe, twirling and dancing, I don’t mind if you crash into me // later you pick a forbidden fruit and say “eat”, I reply, of course, I ain’t ashamed and hell no I ain’t afraid. God prophesied the two shall become one so
look at me solo now Yang blazing towards Aporia, I’m swimming, do you like the way my hands press down into the water and into your flesh?
I’m Yin now, all wet, receiving your actions spiraling with pain and pleasure because I’ve never had it like this [One], I’ll suffer all, your rule, gimme another bite, let me suck the juice outta that pit ~ desire desire, dance upon me Kali for it is thy pleasure, but this is my scene too, so moving well in time we are One & Two & One & Two…
(but humble humble, Ego be humble. Beginners Mind which I did not conceive, I allow you to give birth inside of me)
It always happens the first time leaving a place when it hangs on around longer than I want
and clutches at me as I tear away.
Nostalgia ain’t a feeling, it’s a substance
a little bit and I see something new and positive and get all appreciative all over; overdone though and it’a damn hangover leaving ya in a fuzz phased out like you’re walking around with cataracts in your eyes and sore for weeks on end
I just woke and looking out the window to the trees below not looking like Evergreens, Ponderosa probably. I'm half way home, Shasta area I imagine.
What a song
my heart beats
with your body
while the night
displays the moon
the day the
clouds for moments
now we walk
and kiss and
I think you
sing so lovely